How to Create a Capsule Wardrobe - on a budget and with little to no fashion sense (part 1)

I am not a fashionista in any sense of the word and blogging about clothes is completely outside my comfort zone. I've never been one to spend excessive amounts on clothes- in fact I'll usually wear the pieces I have into the ground before I go out and buy new things. I love thrifting and garage sale-ing. Ask my husband- he usually has to tell me to go buy new clothes. Stitch Fix has been my "guilty pleasure" as far as clothes go, but other than that, I don't really shop.

Don't get me wrong, I love dressing up and looking like I put effort in to myself. I love clothes and the way they individuate people and are a little bit like an art canvas that you wear around on your body. BUT clothes are not my "thing" and try as I may I'll never be the girl who has a closet full of brand name pieces that she can effortlessly pull off- to the envy of every one else in the room. Shopping- and all the options and styles out there, kind of stresses me out, honestly.

What is a Capsule Wardrobe?

When I first heard about the growing trend of creating a capsule wardrobe, I was skeptical. I mean, purposely choosing to wear the same set number of pieces for a whole season seemed a little bit ridiculous and kind of "strict".

But then I read more. As you all know, simplicity and minimalism are both very important to me, as is anything that helps to put the focus onto the immediate moment and away from unimportant things.

That is kind of what capsule wardrobes aim to do.

I read Unfancy, a blog by Caroline Rector who has largely spurred the movement on. She defines a capsule wardrobe as "a mini wardrobe made up of versatile pieces that you totally LOVE to wear". From there, I was hooked. I had never really thought about intentionality and clothes being compatible and the notion of capsule wardrobe completely opened my eyes to something that I think can be very healthy and beneficial.

Rector's capsules are usually around 37 pieces (EVERYTHING. Clothes, pants, dresses, shoes... except workout clothes, accessories, underwear, undershirts and special occasion clothes) that she can easily mix and match to create outfits for an entire season. Some people have even gone as extreme as creating an all seasons capsule, or limiting the number of pieces even more.

The beauty of capsule wardrobes is that they are totally customizable. If you don't like the basic, neutral look that Rector's capsules feature, include clothes that are more your style. It's the premise that stays the same: living with less in every area of life is usually a good thing. Including our clothes. It allows us to be intentional with our purchases, buying things that are not only good quality but pieces we LOVE and feel awesome in.

One day, after looking looking through my closet (which is in two separate rooms in our house for two reasons: I have WAY too many clothes, and we haven't gotten our house organized enough) and feeling like I had nothing to wear, I knew something had to change.

How does it work? 

1 // DOWNSIZE. 

This is definitely a no brainer. The first things to go were the clothes that I haven't worn in over a year (we all know we have them...). I whittled down my closet to pieces that I couldn't part with that I would wear NOW, not in a few months or next year. I ended up getting rid of probably 75% of my clothes.

2 // DONATE OR SELL.

This is where the budget piece comes in. I had a garage sale with my mom where I sold not just clothes but other random clutter (which feels SO amazing to get rid of, trust me) and made enough to supplement my new clothes for my capsule. We donated what we didn't sell, so that it wouldn't just be sitting around in boxes creating more clutter.

I also had an Instagram "shop my closet" sale for the items that weren't garage sale material, but that I still wanted to get rid of, which helped downsize even further.

3 // PLAN. 

This was the really fun part for me. It is all about intentionality and buying exactly what you need. I did all my shopping online, since our options are rather limited here.

I used Un-Fancy's free wardrobe planner, which was super helpful. I definitely recommend it if you're considering starting a capsule! I planned out exactly what I wanted my wardrobe to look like, what colors I wanted, what styles, what pieces I've always dreamed of having but never wanted to spend the money on.....


4 // SHOP

I created a secret Pinterest board for all the items I was considering, to keep them all organized. Then, when I'd found everything I needed, I bought them!

That was definitely the most money I'd spent on clothes in one sitting since high school- and it felt great because it wasn't a spur of the moment purchase. I knew that I would actually wear what I was buying and it wouldn't just sit in my closet two months later collecting dust. I bought things that were high quality and a little bit more expensive, because I knew that I couldn't just make impulse purchases whenever I felt like it.

5 // WEAR IT

I'm still waiting on a few of my packages to come in, but once they all get here, I will share my full capsule with you all! It ended up being WAY smaller than Rector's which surprised me.

Stay tuned for my next post at the beginning of next month where I'll share my capsule AND tips on how to make it work for people who don't have excuses to "dress-up" a lot. You know, those of us who work from home and live in yoga pants and t-shirts. Yep. That's who I am.

Have you heard of capsule wardrobes?  What are your initial reactions to creating one?

Simply DIY // Easy Paint Chip Calendar

Today I have another DIY that has been on the docket for a long time and I finally got around to doing it. I LOVE finding ways to create cute, practical things for my home that I'll actually use. I can't tell you how many projects I've made that have ended up in the trash a few months later because it wasn't practical or I couldn't find a space for it.

This DIY paint chip calendar is as practical as it is simple- and its pretty cute too. I'm really pleased with how mine turned out (because if you follow me on Instagram, you probably saw my embarrassing fail at version one of this project a few weeks ago....) I'm happy to say that this version actually includes every day of the week AND is much cuter.

Here's what you'll need:

Poster board
Scissors
Lots and lots of paint chips in whatever colors you prefer
Washi tape
Regular Tape
A frame with glass or plastic

Step 1 // Cut the poster board to size. You could just use the back of the frame, but I chose to create a separate piece just in case it didn't turn out so that my frame wouldn't be ruined.

Step 2 // Cut the paint chips to size. This was the most meticulous part of the project, as I had to measure/eye-ball how big I wanted each day to be and try and cut them all the same size. The non-perfectionist in me was strong in this one, so forgive my crooked lines and (most likely) different sized squares. I recommend measuring and using a paper cutter if you're the "type A" type.

Step 3 // Arrange the paint chips and tape them down. Since your poster board will be held in place by the frame, I don't think it's important to use anything crazy to hold it down. I tried modpodge last time and it wasn't ideal.

Step 4 // Use washi tape (or whatever you want, really) to create your "month writing spot". That's the technical term for it, I think.

Step 5 // Frame and you're done!

I love how this turned out! And it looks pretty cute next to my little mail organizer, if I do say so myself. 

How do you keep yourself organized? Have you made anything similar to this calendar?

For more DIY's be sure to check out my "DIY" tab at the top of my blog!

You are more than your job title

Any other Monday, we would all be getting dressed and ready for our jobs, chasing kids trying to ready them for school or doing whatever it is we "do" on a regular basis. But today is Labor Day, so we take a break, a day of rest from our normal.

Which got me thinking about the role our jobs play in our lives. 

The amount of job titles out there is kind of staggering. It's amazing that we have the freedom to pursue our dreams, work towards goals and even get paid for working.

But sometimes in the midst of going to and from work and home, the delicate balancing act we all play in some way or another, we can get lost in that job title. 

At some point- whenever we cross the gap from childhood into adulthood- people stop asking us what we want to be and instead as us what we do. As if everything we are is encompassed in this one word that we get paid to do- waitress, teacher, ceo, lawyer, stay at home mom or perhaps even (God-forbid) unemployed. All our lives we are encouraged to dream about who we want to be when we grow up but once you are handed that diploma, or if you don't get one of those it's even sooner, we are expected to know who we are and stop dreaming- most of who we are is wrapped up in a job title. 

But in reality we are so much more than that. I'm not just a stay at home mom or a writer. I'm a friend, a daughter, a wife, an introvert, someone who dreams of owning her own coffee shop, someone who really wants to travel the world, and someone who has a really immature sense of humor sometimes. 

You're not just a teacher or a student or a writer or the drive through guy at Wendy's. 

I think it is a little disheartening that we unknowingly place ourselves in the limiting box of "what do you do?" Our job title is only a small piece of the complexities and intricacies that make us up. 

So this Labor Day, as you're taking a break from what you do, pause to think about who you really are. So that next time someone asks you what you do, you can answer with more than a job title. 

So tell me, friends. What do you do? 

What is a Simple Life? // Five things every minimalist should cultivate

This is definitely a post I should have written a long time ago. Since it's the whole theme of my blog and all...but I just write when the words come, I suppose.

Here at Simply Liv, my goal is to inspire you to live a life that you're excited about. A life that is simple and beautiful, even in the mundane. I strive to do that through not only practical tips and challenges, but through peeks into my own life as well, where I hope I am leading by example. I want to create a community around this idea that simplicity is better.

The problem is, the culture we live in instills in us a "more" mindset from a very young age. In order to be happy, we are told (both directly and indirectly) that we need more- more money, more friends, more stuff, more letters behind our name...just more.

But we know, either through cold, hard experience or through a kind voice who taught us, that more never really satisfies us. The pressure to have more is overwhelming and all consuming and if you're immersed in that mindset for a while, it can be very hard to break. But the desire for more (except where healthy ambition and goals are concerned), often leads to a downward spiral. We get consumed by our quest for more, eventually leaving us with less than we started with.

While I haven't considered myself a "true minimalist" yet, I have way more things than I should and often catch myself longing for more- I believe there are ways we all can and should live, if simplicity is our goal. These five points are my "definition" for simplicity- it's not an exhaustive list or a textbook description, just what I have learned is important to live a life that is simple and full.

A Simple Life is: 

1// Intentional: to live a life that is simple, you must be trying to. Duh, Olivia. But really, simplicity doesn't come naturally for most of us. We have to look at our lives, our mindset and our heart to make sure we are cultivating the right attitude, and that requires a lot of intentionality. Be intentional about your relationships, what you bring into your home- everything.

2// Uncluttered: this is the "stuff" point in the list. There isn't a right or wrong answer here, friends. Like most of these points, it will vary from one person to the next. But acquiring more things shouldn't be the goal of any minimalist. That's not to say don't treat yourself, or buy nice things- but don't hoard or buy more than you need.

3// Authentic: Authenticity is one of my favorite words. I love being around people who are real. We all know them- the one's who don't put on a mask. They're genuine, whether they're having the worst day of their life or are on cloud nine. Have authentic friends and be an authentic friend. It's at the heart of simple living.

4// Content: This is along the lines of being uncluttered, though this aims more at the heart than at physical possessions. Contentment is something I have always struggled with, which is why it is so important to me. I have to be very intentional about cultivating a heart of contentment, with lots of prayer, because I tend to always want more. If I'm not happy in the now, then I'm bound to live a very sad life. I'm striving to be the best I can be where I am planted, knowing that when it is time to move on, God will lead us when and where we are meant to go. It is a hard attitude to have.

5// Creative: I believe a simple life is essentially a creative life. It isn't "by the book". It often leads you into rugged, uncharted territory, perhaps physically but more often mentally and spiritually. Whether you're an artist or don't consider yourself to be a creative type- this will apply to you. You are creating the life you live, the choices you make in this moment affect where your day, week, month will go. Let's create lives that we are proud of. Be original and don't be afraid to break the mold.

Which of these do you focus on in your life? Why is living a simple life important to you?

Have a happy new week friends!

Simply,

Liv

Simply Disconnect // Week 3

Hi friends! How was everyone's week?

There's only one week left of the #simplydisconnect challenge and I (a.) can't believe how fast this month has gone and (b.) am learning so much from just reining in my social media use.

I won't go over the whole challenge here, for the sake of those of you who have been with me the whole time, but if you're just joining me (and you should! It's never too late.) you can read about the challenge here and the week one and two recaps here and here.

Last week I talked about how I had an "off" week. I wasn't on top of the challenge and honestly, not very motivated to put the boundaries on myself that I set up earlier. I gave myself grace, because we all have times when our goals seem like more of a burden, but I kept going.

This week, however, has been much better. We've rounded the halfway point and I think my habits (incessant phone checking, aimless scrolling, using SM as a distraction...) are slowly starting to break. I'm more aware of when I'm doing these things and have the self control to put the device down to focus on what's in front of me. Because that's what the challenge is really about- real life. I don't want to miss out on it. The coming of Fall, the fading of Summer, my daughter's last months as a one year old- I don't want any of it to be clouded by wasted time.

When I have used social media, it has been very intentionally. I'm working on building relationships, connecting with people and finding others who inspire me to create. I'm learning the importance of adding something of value to what others are posting, more than just a "like" - if we are to create true community, it's vital to take the time to comment and start an actual conversation. Even something as simple as "I appreciate what you've created" or "this really meant something to me" goes a (very) long way.

This week's challenge was to get outside and disconnect. And I'm happy to say I did a lot of it. While I couldn't go anywhere remote and exciting like I wish, I was able to take my girls outside several times and went running in the crisp, early morning hours. Both Evie and Mara love being outside, so it wasn't hard to get them outside. We played at the park, found sticks (Evie's favorite), swam, ran through the sprinkler.

How did you get outside this week?

For the fourth and final week- the challenge is up to you! Do something exciting, challenging and maybe a little bit scary. Get creative. And don't forget to share via the hashtag simplydisconnect.

Thank you all for joining me in this challenge! You inspire me.

Here are a few of the photos from the challenge that I'm loving so far. Thanks for sharing ladies!

Five Ways to De-Stress (that actually work)

This morning has been a rough one so far. It's not even 9 am and I already want a nap. It's one of those mornings where I've been spit up on one too many times to be cute and have snapped "no", "stop",  and "don't" at my toddler more times than I'd like to admit. AJ has been working extra long days this weekend (he works Saturday-Monday...) and the days are long at home by myself with the babies. I have a to-do list as long as my kitchen table and I'll be lucky to cross one thing off it today. And we are out of coffee. Anyone else feeling the "monday-ness" of today?

It's a new week which means new to-do lists (or maybe the same list you've been procrastinating/working on for weeks), new goals and more often than not, new stresses.

As moms, bloggers, students...whatever we are, we usually tend to have way too much on our plates. It's easy to get overwhelmed as the list grows and our motivation shrinks. In our efforts to live simply, it's important to set aside time to unwind, even in the smallest ways. So today, I thought I would share a few of the ways I've learned to take a step back and de-stress when the to-do lists overwhelm me. Because I need them today too.

1 // Take a Break. When I'm in the middle of a project that overwhelms me- mountains of dishes, a daunting article for work- stepping back to focus my energy somewhere else helps re-inspire me to get back to work with fresh eyes. Except when the problem is dishes. I've never felt inspired to tackle that project.

2 // Write it Down. Not everyone is a list maker, but man oh man, I definitely am. Making a physical list of things I need to get done not only helps simplify my day in my mind, but it motivates me to work. Is there anything more satisfying than crossing off your to-do list? Maybe, like, two things...but list-crossing-off is definitely top three.

3 // Do Something Active. Take a walk, do a few yoga poses, go run a marathon- whatever you're into and whatever helps clear your mind for a little while. Physical activity literally refreshes your body, giving you an awesome chance to jump back into what was stressing you out before.

4 // Talk it Out. Usually when I'm stressed out it's because I've spent too much time over-thinking one thing, blowing it way out of proportion. Can I get an "amen", fellow over-thinkers? Talking with someone who can help reason with me and bring calm in to the situation inspires me to keep working with fresh eyes.

5 // Get Rested. Our crazy, hectic schedules mean less rest, and less rest means more stress. See the vicious cycle we trap ourselves in? Something as simple as a nap or a bath or just sitting down to have a quiet time...whatever relaxes your soul...will refresh you. I promise.

I'll leave you with this quote from George MacDonald, because rest truly is sacred. If you're stressed about anything on this Monday morning, and most of us probably are, take a few minutes and try one of these tips. Rest. Take a quick break so that you can pour your full self into your work.

What are you stressing about this morning? Do you have a favorite way to relax and refresh? Tell me about it!

Simply Disconnect // Week 1

Happy Friday friends! We did it. One week down, three to go.

If you're just joining me, today I'm sharing about my 30 Day Social Media Challenge that we started last week. Read more about it here- and please join us! It's never too late :)

I've been so encouraged and excited by how many of you have joined me in this journey to take back our social media. There have been some wonderful posts shared under our hashtag #simplydisconnect- one friend even challenged her husband to do 40 days of reading the Bible together before bed instead of watching tv. What a worthwhile challenge!

I've had a lot of people respond to this as a "social media fast"- where you completely cut out social media for a month. And while that is definitely an awesome challenge, it's not really what I'm aiming for here. My goal is to use social media during the 30 days- but with limits and intentionality. I want to cut out the aimless scrolling and random creeping (you know we all do it...). It's confusing, but I really think that we can/should retrain ourselves to use SM as it was intended to be used- as a tool to connect with others, not compare/stalk/waste time.

And so far so good.

Here are a few things that happened during one week of intentional social media use:

1// I was bored. This one shocked me after the first few days. I realized that when I didn't have anything better to do, I automatically reach for my phone to fill the time. I'm learning that it's ok to be bored- some of my best writing has come out of times when I'm "bored". I'm challenging myself to fill those spaces with things that matter- a game with E, writing in my journal, reading a book...something other than hopping on Facebook or Insta.

2// I was super productive. You guys, I somehow managed to keep two children alive, cook multiple meals, clean the house, get ahead on blog posts and other articles and do other normal life things all without the help of my phone. With all this new found downtime, I may take up a new hobby. Any suggestions? I'm thinking maybe wine tasting? ;)

3// I had "withdrawals". As with any addiction, there is a withdrawal period. Like most of us, I have this weird need to keep up with everyone on my Instagram feed and everyone I'm friends with on Facebook. I don't want to miss anything. Breaking that was hard. I've had to tell myself that I'll miss somethings and that's ok- people are living their lives and I'm busy living mine.

4// I made connections. During the times I posted on social media- which happened quite often actually, I was really intentional about connecting with the people who liked/commented on my posts and adding something of value to their feed or comment. I know that social media has the potential to form amazing relationships and connections, especially in the blogging world, and being intentional is the easiest way to form those relationships.

This week's challenge was to connect with someone over coffee- not a hypothetical/online coffee date, because I'm pretty sure that's a thing, but in a "real life", face-to-face, sit down and talk kind of way. Because I'm really original and because we haven't had a date since Mara was born, I decided to take my man out for Qdoba (because we're classy) and coffee. It was a great (baby free!) time of connection. We talked about plans for our future, goals, jobs, school and encouraged each other to be content with where we're at now. It was definitely a needed moment- it's easy to let the opportunities to connect with your spouse slip by in the bustle of everyday.

Here are a few cheesy photos, in case you needed proof:

See how happy and connected we look? ;)

How did your coffee dates go?! Whether you did my challenge for the week or tweaked it- I want to hear about it! Tell me about it in the comments below, write a post about it or use our hashtag (#simplydisconnect) to share. Seriously- I want to see.

Good luck with week number two, friends. Our challenge for the week is to write and actual letter to someone and send it the old fashioned way. I'm really excited about this one, because hand written letters are some of my very favorite things.

Happy weekend, loves.

Simply,

Liv

Staying Active and Healthy Post-Baby

This shop has been compensated by Collective Bias, Inc. and its advertiser. All opinions are mine alone. #RewardHealthyChoices #CollectiveBias 

If there's one thing I've learned since having babies, it's that having time to myself do anything is hard to come by. But every once in a while, when the stars align and both babies are sleeping, or some other miracle happens, I will have a few moments of free time. I'm a month postpartum now and am feeling fully recovered from my delivery. I'm ready to get back into my healthy, active lifestyle that I (mostly) kept up with before I was pregnant. Getting in workouts can be tricky when you don't have 2 hours to spend alone at the gym, so I've been thinking of ways I can be intentional about being healthy with my babies at home.

A few months ago I came across Walgreen's new Balance Rewards for healthy choices app and was pretty intrigued as to how helpful it could assist me in simplifying my health goals. Our family shops at Walgreens quite often (in an effort to avoid the craziness that is Walmart) and once I discovered that I could earn actual points towards my shopping for making and recording everyday healthy choices, I was hooked. Honestly, I've already earned points just by going on a walk with my girls, doing simple floor exercises at home once they're in bed (remember that part about seizing the moment?) and going for runs. The app even has an option for larger goals like weight management and quitting smoking.
I earned enough points that I decided to take a trip with E to Walgreens and splurge a little bit.  You know you're a mom when "splurging" includes Walgreens and Lotion...but don't judge me.

My little helper picked out three awesome Aveeno products that I typically wouldn't have purchased (because I'm cheap) but could now thanks to the points I earned AND a coupon from the same Balance Rewards for healthy choices app. I'll most likely be going back for more because from now until August 29 you can earn 2,000 Walgreens rewards points for purchasing any two J&J Healthy Essentials products- which includes Aveeno. Just saying.

Here's a little peak at how we put our points to good use at home that night:

Though it is tricky to bounce right back into an active lifestyle after a pregnancy, with the help of this app and two sleeping babies (with super soft skin ;) I'm excited to get back to the "pre-pregnancy" me!

Be sure to check out more ways to live a healthy lifestyle here. What are some simple ways that you stay active at home?

Simply Disconnect: A 30 Day Social Media Challenge

This post has been a long time in the making. The past 6 months or so I've been really focused on growing this little blog- networking with other bloggers, putting myself out there to bigger companies, creating new content, working on my writing and photography skills. And it has indeed been growing! Simply Liv is expanding from just a personal online journal of our family life to a community of like-minded people who are passionate about living simply. I've been so excited to see some of my hard work paying off. It's mostly just behind the scenes, but I'm really proud of this little space and have loved engaging with so many people through it.

However, I've noticed a tendency in myself to go overboard. In the bad way. I become so excited and obsessed with my stats and likes and keeping up with Facebook and Instagram feeds that I forget the entire purpose behind my blog- simple living. Numbers are addicting and grabbing my phone is all I have to do to access them. I realized how much time I was spending on aimless scrolling and was kind of embarrassed. I thought about the example I was setting for Evie and Mara; I don't want them to remember me always plugged in to something. I know that there has to be a way to enjoy social media and use it for the purpose it was intended for- connecting with others- without wasting ALL of my time on it.

And I don't think I'm the only one who struggles with the addictiveness of social media. 

So I thought a challenge might be in order.

This challenge isn't just for me- though I will obviously be participating. I would love to see other people join me in re-training ourselves to view social media as a tool and not "the ultimate" and to reconnect with the everyday things we may otherwise miss. So share this with your friends/family/blogging buddies and lets make it grow! I will be doing the challenge for the next 30 days, so feel free to join me now or any 30 day period that works for you.

Here's what the 30 day challenge is all about:

Goals:

1// to be more present in the actual moment

2// to spend less time "scrolling" and more time connecting

3// to view social media as a tool, not a way to spend your time

4// to interact with people (in "real life" and online) and not use our phone to hide behind (think grocery store checkouts, bus rides, people sitting next to you...)

"Rules": again, this challenge is totally customizable. If our goals are the same, I trust that the boundaries you set for yourself will reflect that. These are the guidelines that I'm setting for myself and to give you some inspiration for what might work for you.

1// No social media 1 hr before bed. Use this time to read, talk with your spouse, watch a movie together or unwind.

2// No devices by your bed. I'll be keeping my phone outside of the bedroom during the night and putting an actual clock in the room to make the late night nursing sessions with Mara less tempting.

3// ONE device at a time. No browsing Facebook while watching a movie with AJ. No scrolling through Instagram in the middle of a conversation. (Yikes...as I'm saying these it sounds super bad....this truly is an addiction we're dealing with here...)

4// No devices during a meal or face-to-face conversation OR while in the car. Leave it in your purse.

5// Post to social media and be done. No checking for new likes/comments every 30 seconds. I will probably set times for myself to check- like in the morning and a night. Not just whenever I get bored.

Weekly Challenge: Every week I will set one big goal for myself. Since it's a 30 day challenge, I'll have 4 goals. They aim at connecting with people and setting down the phones. If you have great ideas for a weekly challenge, let me know and I'll change them up!

1// take an actual person out for coffee that you haven't connected with in a while and leave your phone in your bag. 

2// Write a letter to a friend and send it the old fashioned way ;) 

3// Get outside! Do something active/relaxing/fun outside for the day. It can be anything as long as you're fully present!

4// Open for suggestions! I can only brainstorm so much people....

I know for some of us, social media is part of our job. The goal isn't to abandon our responsibilities or even fast from all social media but simply to retrain ourselves to see them as a means to an end and not use them as distractions from "real life".

Documentation: Ok. I struggled with this part for a long time. It felt counter productive almost, but I've decided to go for it anyway because I reallyreallyreally want to be able to see how the challenge is affecting everyone.

We will be using the hashtag #simplydisconnect to post (not excessively, of course) ways the challenge is helping us and to connect with other people taking the challenge. This is tricky because the whole point of the challenge is to lessen our social media use- but I think we can do this the right way. I'm thinking of using #simplydisconnect to share our weekly challenges and such with each other or even one post at the end of the 30 days. I'm open to input on this one too ;)

Alright, let's do this! AJ and I will be starting the challenge tomorrow (August 1st) and going until the 30th. I will do a weekly blog post on Fridays about it during the month of August as well as using the hashtag on my instagram.

Let's disconnect so that we can be intentional about connecting with others both offline and online! It won't be easy, but I know you can do it.

Oh- and if you're participating, be sure and tell me so I can follow you and see how it's going!

Simply,

Liv

Growing Up Together: 6 Tips for Young Couples // A Guest Post

Today's post is the last of my guest posts scheduled for the month. I hope you've loved hearing from them as much as I have! You can read Julie's post on summer date ideas here, and Natasha's post here to learn how to make some super cute summertime placemats. 

This post is extra special because I'm introducing you all to my sister-in-law Rachael! She and my little brother Sam celebrated their first anniversary on the 12th and so I asked if Rach would be willing to share a few things she's learned as a young wife. 

I can relate so much to the tips she is sharing and I know you all will too. Be sure to check out more of her heart-felt, beautiful words on her blog here.

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People getting to know me are often surprised to hear that I am already married.

"Wow! You look so young!"

"I thought you were like... 17 or something."

I even had one girl tell me, "You're too pretty to be married." :) Well... okay. (I guess people are supposed to grow uglier after they've said their vows?) I really don't feel like I was married "super young", though I probably was. To be fair, I never thought I'd be married so soon--though I didn't see myself finding Mr. Right late in life either. Life just worked out that way for me, I guess.

 It's kinda trending in my circle of friends to get married young right now. I'm excited for them, and I support them wholeheartedly with their decision to tie the knot. I remember having conversations with Sam about how long we should wait before we got married. Sam told me that he had always thought he'd wait until he was at least 20 to get married. We set a prospective 2-3 year wait on ourselves since we started dating when he was 17 and I was 18. As we grew closer, we felt that it was more important to live a pure life and honor God with our relationship rather than to wait and make poor choices because "we weren't old enough to get married". So, on July 12, 2014 we were married on a perfect Summer day--7 months before Sam's 20th birthday.

 Though I support young marriage, I won't pretend that it is always easy. There were a lot of things I wish I knew before getting married that have been hard lessons to swallow. What's ironic is that some of these things I already knew! Or thought I did. It's amazing how living with another person brings out all the crazy, messy, and often ugly things out to the light.

Though I don't claim to be an expert on marriage by any means (far, far from it) there are a few things I would suggest to young couples who are married, or thinking about getting married soon, that I have learned and found helpful in our own relationship. 

So here we go.

1// Things are almost always different than you expect.

Something that really blindsided me when we got married was just how different my expectations were from reality. After Sam proposed, I remember going home and almost existing in a state of dull numbness and shock. I was happy, yes--very happy that he had actually asked, but I wasn't bursting with all the bubbly, over-excited feelings that I thought I should be having. I grew a little frustrated with myself because I didn't feel the way one should feel after being engaged. This feeling of expectation traveled with me even through the wedding ceremony, after our first kiss, and up until now. I still don't know if I should feel any different after being married to my best friend for a year. The movies always make the scene where the bride walks down the aisle look glamorous and like it's the moment she's been living for her whole life. I have always been happy that I am Sam's bride, but the actual wedding day sprinted past and left me wondering if there was something wrong with me for feeling--or not feeling--the way I thought I should.

What I came to realize after all of this is that instead of growing frustrated with how I thought things should be, I should instead learn to love things for the way they are. Maybe things aren't always as memorable, flashy, or fulfilling as I thought. Instead of feeling like I'm missing out, perhaps I can move past that and learn to savor each moment for being a great real moment instead of the fantasy I dreamed up.

 2// Communication is essential.

Yeah, they always say this during your pre-marital classes, but I never realized how much it really comes into effect until I had to share my everyday with someone who thinks really different from me. I often feel sorry for Sam because he has to deal with an emotional, indecisive, woman who thinks he should already get some things by now. We struggled a lot while we were dating with my difficulty with speaking my thoughts and feelings. I'm one of those people that doesn't like to hurt people's feelings or deal with conflict, so it was really a stretch for me to tell Sam everything. I have a hard time identifying with women who say that their men don't ever talk or share their feelings with them because my experience has been just the opposite. Sam shared everything with me and I've had to learn how to be more honest with him.

Sam has repeatedly told me that if I don't tell him something, he's not going to know it himself. So at those times that I got mad at him for not helping me out with the chores, he didn't know that his actions were hurting me because I didn't make it clear. It's tempting for me to assume that men are just more dense toward certain issues, but I know that for myself, I have a bad habit of beating around the bush when I want something. Being more attuned to his wife's needs and hints is something that the guy won't know right away. He'll have to work on it and learn over time, but he really needs his wife to be more straightforward with him as well.

3// Be patient with changes.

This one goes along with point 2. When your spouse is learning to be a better mate, try not to get on them for the slow process that it takes for them to change. Sometimes the very things that you'll be asking them to change will be habits and actions that are just a normal part of life to them. They may have lived with some of these habits since they were children and they won't be able to just change overnight. Sometimes your husband or wife may have some struggles in their life that hurt you. When they come to a point where they want to change those things, be sure that you recognize their efforts and growth from where they came from. Be sure that they know that you are standing beside them in their fight to better themselves and that you will be their biggest supporter and cheerleader. They'll appreciate knowing that you are on their side more than your complaints and nagging over their failures.

4// Spend time to get to know them.

This is true both before and after you are married. The thing most people worry about for young couples is that they're rushing into their decision to get married without fully realizing what their getting in to. I do encourage young couples to spend time getting to know each other's character more than just their interests and physical attractiveness.

My husband and I waited to share our first kiss at the altar. Though this isn't what we expect for everyone's relationship, we felt that it was something special we would do that we would share only for the one we got married to. Because we waited to do this we felt that we really got to know each other's character and personality more.

It is common in our culture today to think that in order to really know if someone is a right fit for you, you have to "try them out". My philosophy is that you can always get to know those things after you're married, but you can't take them back after you find out that their character doesn't work with yours. When dating, I feel that it is best to spend a lot of time doing "friend things" together to find out if this person is the one you want to be with for the rest of your life. And after you tie the knot, don't neglect spending time together on those "friend things"--be sure to make time in your busy schedules to go on dates with your spouse. 

5// Have an unlimited supply of forgiveness.

I hate that phrase, "loving means never having to say you're sorry," because it couldn't be farther from the truth. I'm actually convinced that telling your spouse that you're sorry is one of the most loving things you can say to them sometimes. You'll have plenty of opportunities to say it and so will they. Living in a broken world, we will all have our bad days, (or bad weeks). This imperfect human you're living with will make mistakes and hurt you deeper than anyone else can. It is important to be quick to forgive and not allow chance for bitterness to grow roots. Sometimes your guy or gal will make the same mistake multiple times within the same day, but you'll want to work it out and forgive them again.

6// Grow together.

You are both a team. Being young has its advantages. You get to have the chance to grow up and learn valuable life lessons together, where people who meet later in life have already set themselves in a certain direction. You don't have to have everything settled or figured out. You'll figure those things out together. You'll go through your scary first apartment, or having one of you work full-time while the other is in college. All these experiences will grow you closer together as a couple. They are hard things to go through, frustrating at times, but they help you grow up as one.

Your willingness to serve your spouse will help you both make it in this scary adult world. :) Sometimes I had to realize that things were not all about me (No, duh!). Sometimes I have to make sacrifices and focus on doing what's best for both of us and not just what I want to do. This is all part of growing up with my husband, and I am still learning all of these things everyday.

As I look back on one year of marriage behind us, I am so thankful for all the things we've already grown in and for all the years and adventures to come.

Simply Eat // (Our Favorite) Banana Oat Pancakes

It's no secret that I'm a little bit pancake obsessed. While I was pregnant, I craved pancakes for all three meals. The downside of pancakes, however, is that they can be a bit time consuming. Or maybe that should read- I can be a bit lazy and hate measuring out a thousand different ingredients just to make my breakfast. Pancakes are especially tricky when you're trying to avoid gluten...

Enter the all time favorite breakfast at our house! These pancakes not only taste like the breakfast of your dreams, but they are made with only THREE ingredients to boot. Yep- three. Both AJ and Evie will eat these any time of the day, which makes my ridiculous pancake cravings a little bit more manageable.

I wanted to share these with you all, banking on the hope that you're as pancake crazed (and lazy) as I am. Here's to making our mornings simple and delicious!

Lets get to it:

Ingredients:
-1 ripe banana
-2 eggs
-2 packets of oatmeal (I used to make these with regular oats- which you totally can- but for convenience's sake discovered that these little guys make THE perfect flavor. You can go whichever route floats your boat.)

Step 1 // Put all of the ingredients into a food processor or blender and blend until smooth. You can adjust the texture as needed. If its too thick either add another egg or a little bit of almond milk. If its too runny add more oats.

Step 2 // Pour batter onto greased griddle and cook for 1-2 minutes on each side.

That's it! See? Easiest breakfast ever. Enjoy with some fresh fruit and a mug of your favorite coffee.

What's your go-to breakfast for busy days?

An Introduction

Our sweet girl finally joined us! We are all so in love and she couldn't be doing better. I'll share her birth story soon, but here are some photos I snapped just to hold you over. My heart is full and I'm so grateful to have her in my arms.

Simply DIY // Easy Mail Organizer

I've been doing a happy dance all week, guys. I'm so excited to introduce a new series here at Simply Liv! It's more of an "ongoing" series- with no end in sight, but I can't wait to start sharing it with you all.

I'm calling it my SIMPLE LIVING series (you never saw that title coming, did you?) and over the course of a few months (or forever maybe), I'll be sharing practical ways to simplify your life and live with intentionality. I'll share everything from DIY's, to recipes, to random life hacks about parenting and marriage. Since this is more or less the theme of my blog, I thought it would be fun to have more posts be specifically about practical ways to live simply. I've been rounding up ideas for a long time and decided this would be a great first post, since I haven't done a DIY in months, and my creative brain needed some release.

Raise your hand if your dining room table is overflowing with stack of bills and other random pieces of mail? Mine too. It's been driving me crazy for months- having to push everything to one end just to make room to sit down to eat. I've been brainstorming ideas for how to solve this problem and I think I finally came up with something that will work!

This mail organizer is super simple and can be made with basically anything you have around the house. I used pegboard, fabric and an old chalk board because it's what I had lying around- but the possibilities are many, my friends.

Here's how I did it:

Materials:

-Peg board (Or any kind of board. I thought about using a bulletin board.)
-Fabric scraps
-Super glue
-Left over paint
-Scissors
-Sharpies
-Magnets (I actually ended up not using them- but I think it would be awesome to make one of these for your fridge!)

1. First I sewed the fabric into little pockets for the mail to go in. Don't be intimidated by the word "sew". I literally hand-stitched up the sides and tops to make sure it wouldn't fray- super quick and easy. If you're anti-sewing though, you could just pin or glue the fabric pockets on without sewing up the sides.

2. I painted the pegboard with left over paint from our walls. One of the good things about remodels- LOTS of paint.  Here's what it looked like after one coat:

I ended up doing three coats.

3. Attach the pockets. I picked the easiest thing I could think of for this- super glue- and I don't think those pockets are going anywhere soon. I made the little labels with cardboard, because I'm super fancy. Then I painted them white and used the sharpie paint pen to trace around the edge for a little bit of distinction.

4. Superglue the chalkboard on and trace around the edges. I recycled the chalkboard from another piece of art I had around the house but wasn't crazy about- but you could also just use chalk board paint and another (super fancy) piece of cardboard or thin board.

And there you have it! Your dining room table suddenly has room to be used as nature intended AND you have a super cute (super cheap) way to store all of those bills that you've been ignoring.

 

What are some simple solutions to clutter in your home? I'd love to hear your stories of simple living success! And as always, be sure to let me know if you try this one out! 

Ps. to see my DIY TV tray makeover from the picture above click here

Simply,

Liv